How to relax, like really, actually relax.

Are you tired of constantly feeling stressed and bored of the same old "take-a-bubble-bath-and-meditate" kinda relaxation advice? Well, of course, taking a bubble bath or meditation, for that matter, might help you sometimes, but there are times when we need to delve deeper and uncover the root causes of our persistent worries and stresses.

Source - Tenor

In this blog, we uncover the core concepts of relaxation for long-term well-being. So, let's jump right in and discover how to relax—like, really relax. Ready? Let's go!

1. Unleash your inner chill: Discover what truly relaxes you

Let's face it, we've all been there. You hear about these so-called relaxation techniques like meditating, reading a book, or soaking in a hot bath, but when you try them, it feels like watching paint dry. And that’s because you're a unique individual, and your relaxation needs are too!

Relaxation is like a secret recipe, customized to your unique taste buds. What truly relaxes you might be entirely different from what works for others. It's time to ditch the "supposed to" mentality and find your own unique path to relaxation. Here are some steps to help you get started:

Soul searching, baby

Maybe it's binge-watching your favorite TV show, dancing like nobody's watching, or cuddling with your furry friends. The answer lies within, my friend!

Experiment, my dear Watson

Now's the time to break free from your relaxation comfort zone and explore uncharted territories.

Try yoga, deep breathing (we're talking inhale the good stuff, exhale the bad stuff), or even humming like a blissful bee. Fancy a little aromatherapy? Sniff away! The goal is to embrace new experiences and see what vibes with your soul. Here’s a list to help you get started - 45 ways to relax.

The body knows best

Listen closely as your body whispers its relaxation desires. Pay attention to the signs - the way your muscles loosen up, your breath deepens, and your heart beats at a more relaxed pace.

Soak in a warm bath, indulge in a massage, or dive headfirst into the world of mindfulness. Let your body be your relaxation compass, guiding you to that magical chill zone.

Set the scene

Creating the perfect ambiance can make all the difference in your relaxation journey.

Picture this: soft lighting, tranquil tunes, and a space that feels like a cozy haven. Dim the lights, bring out the scented candles, and put on some mood-enhancing music. It's your personal chill sanctuary, so customize it to fit your relaxation style.

Consistency is key

Once you've discovered your relaxation groove, keep that rhythm going.

Schedule regular relaxation sessions, whether it's a daily meditation date, a weekly dance party extravaganza, or a monthly spa retreat (we all need those!). Making relaxation a non-negotiable part of your routine will keep stress at bay.

2. Peeling back the layers: Unveiling the sources of stress

While relaxation is a great remedy, it may not be enough when serious issues linger within. Relaxation serves as a band-aid for symptoms, but to truly tackle stress, it's crucial to uncover the root causes.

To aid in your diagnosis, let's explore cognitive distortions that can crank up stress levels by distorting how we perceive situations:

The "Extreme-o-Meter"

This distortion involves seeing things in extreme terms, with no middle ground.

Imagine getting a not-so-perfect score on a test, and suddenly your mind erupts with screams of "Complete academic failure!" But hold on, take a deep breath, and let's hit the brakes on this stress train.

Source - Tenor

It's time to recognize this all-or-nothing thinking and free yourself from the clutches of perfectionism. Embrace the power of progress, because it's the journey that truly counts, not just the destination. Remember, you gave it your best shot, and that's what matters most.

The "Generalization Trap"

This distortion involves making broad generalizations based on limited evidence.

Picture this: you encounter rejection in a romantic relationship. Suddenly, stress takes the stage, whispering in your ear, "You'll never find love again! All future relationships are doomed!" But hold on a second! Let's shine a light on the bigger picture.

One setback doesn't define your entire love journey. It's natural to feel stressed, but remember, there are countless other factors at play. Don't let this one situation hijack your view of the topic. Remember that there's a diverse range of possibilities waiting beyond this moment.

The "Assumption Olympics"

This distortion involves making assumptions without sufficient evidence.

Imagine this: you send a message to your friend, and they don't respond right away. Suddenly, your mind takes a giant jump, declaring, "They must be upset with me!" But hold on, let's take a pause and consider other possible reasons for the delayed response.

Remember, assumptions without sufficient evidence are like gymnastic routines without proper landings—they're prone to errors. So, take a breath, stay flexible, and give your friend the benefit of the doubt. The real medal here is open communication, not jumping to conclusions.

The "Negative Spotlight Syndrome"

This distortion involves disproportionately focusing on negative aspects while ignoring or minimizing positive elements.

Imagine this: you receive positive feedback on a project, but one critical comment sneaks in. Suddenly, that spotlight intensifies, fixating solely on the criticism, while ignoring the overall positive feedback.

Source - Giphy

But hold on! It's time to readjust the spotlight and bring balance to the stage.

Don't let that one negative comment steal the show. Embrace the full spectrum of feedback, recognizing both constructive criticism and uplifting praise.

"Should" statements

This distortion involves setting rigid expectations about how things should be, leading to disappointment and stress when reality doesn't align.

For instance, suppose you believe you “should” never make mistakes. But guess what? That kind of thinking creates immense pressure and stress when you inevitably slip up. It's time to break free!

Embrace the reality that mistakes happen and that's okay. So, let go of the "shoulds" and find peace in accepting yourself and your journey.

By recognizing these cognitive distortions and challenging them with more balanced and rational thinking, it's possible to reduce the impact of stress on our well-being.

3. How “NOT” to rest

When it comes to resting, it's important to avoid certain pitfalls that can hinder your relaxation, here are some resting don'ts:

Leaving yourself open to distractions

Resting effectively requires setting boundaries and creating a conducive environment. If you leave yourself open to distractions, you may find it challenging to truly relax.

Minimize potential interruptions by communicating your boundaries to others, creating a quiet and comfortable space, and silencing notifications on your devices. This way, you can fully immerse yourself in the restorative activities you've chosen.

Ruminating on to-do lists

Allowing your mind to constantly wander back to your to-do lists during rest time can prevent you from fully relaxing. It's crucial to cultivate the ability to temporarily set aside your responsibilities and immerse yourself in restorative activities.

Consider creating a physical or digital system to capture and organize your tasks, giving yourself peace of mind that you won't forget them.

Turning hobbies into side hustles

While it's great to pursue your passions and potentially monetize them, turning every hobby into a side hustle can strip away the joy and relaxation they once brought. It's essential to preserve some activities solely for personal enjoyment without the pressure of productivity or financial gain.

Set boundaries around your hobbies and designate specific times when they are purely for pleasure.

Comparison trap

Resist the urge to compare your relaxation style with others. Remember, everyone's idea of rest is unique. What brings them peace may not work for you.

Embrace your own preferences and create a restful haven tailored to your needs.

Guilt trip

Leave the guilt at the door when entering the realm of relaxation. It's easy to feel guilty for taking time off or putting your needs first. But remember, self-care is not selfish. Embrace the belief that taking care of yourself is essential for your overall well-being.

Overcommitment overload

Be cautious of overcommitting and filling your schedule to the brim with activities. Rest becomes elusive when you're constantly rushing from one activity to the next.

Learn to say "no" to unnecessary commitments and create space for leisure and rejuvenation.

Perfectionist paralysis

Don't feel pressured to pursue every relaxing activity flawlessly.

Simply begin with what brings you joy and don't worry about achieving perfection in everything you do.

Neglecting self-care during resting

As much as you may be tempted to spend all day in bed watching your favorite series, remember that neglecting your basic self-care needs during rest time won't be helpful in the long run.

Remember to eat well, hydrate, do gentle exercise, and follow basic hygiene.

By avoiding these common pitfalls mentioned above and understanding your own needs, you can cultivate a restful and rejuvenating routine that supports your overall well-being.

4. Rest is a right, not a privilege to earn

Okay, listen up folks! Here's a trap we often fall into—thinking we have to earn our rest. Hands up if you've been guilty of this! We convince ourselves that we can't relax until we finish all our tasks and chores, making rest a distant reward.

But here's the scoop: our to-do lists never seem to end, and we end up working too much and resting too little. Not only that, but this mindset can sabotage the precious moments of rest we do manage to snatch. Guilt and distractions sneak in, making it hard to truly enjoy and feel deserving of the relaxation we desperately need.

So, here's the game-changer: Rest is not a luxury you earn; it's a vital necessity! Your brain craves downtime, and your body deserves the rejuvenation that comes from a well-deserved break. Let go of the idea that rest is a shiny trophy for completing tasks. Embrace the truth that rest is essential to your well-being, no ifs, ands, or buts about it!

You, my friend, deserve rest simply because you need it.

5. Let rest be, without expectations

In our current society, there is an overwhelming expectation, fueled by social media, that rest should have transformative powers, capable of addressing all our problems such as burnout, anxiety, and stress. We come across countless posts and reels that depict rest days, self-care, and relaxation as the ultimate solutions to our struggles. Consequently, we start to anticipate that our own rest experiences should mirror those idealized depictions. However, the reality is often quite different.

Rest is a deeply personal and subjective experience, varying from person to person and even from day to day. Numerous factors influence how we perceive and respond to moments of relaxation. This societal pressure to achieve a certain level of rejuvenation during rest can generate anxiety and unrealistic expectations.

We start believing that we should always emerge from a period of rest feeling completely revitalized, rather than taking the time to mindfully observe and acknowledge how we genuinely feel.

It is essential for us to shift our focus from the predetermined notion of how rest should make us feel and instead direct our attention to the actual sensations and emotions we experience during relaxation. By doing so, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and cultivate a more realistic perspective on what rest truly entails.

6. Trust your inner sloth: Intuitive resting

Have you ever noticed that your body sends signals when it needs a break? It's time to start paying attention to those whispers. Intuitive resting encourages you to tune in and listen to what your body is telling you. Perhaps it's a subtle ache in your muscles, a yawn that won't go away, or a cloud of brain fog. However, in the whirlwind of daily life, we often ignore or dismiss these whispers, pushing ourselves to the brink of exhaustion.

So, the next time your body sends a signal, pause and tune in. Is your back stiff and achy? Are your eyelids drooping and begging for sleep? Or do you feel like your brain is struggling to keep up with your to-do list? These are the whispers, the gentle reminders that it's time to give yourself a break.

Source - Tenor

By acknowledging and addressing these whispers, you are embracing a proactive approach to rest, preventing burnout, and fostering a harmonious relationship with your body.

Whether it's sinking into the cozy embrace of a soft armchair, taking a leisurely stroll in nature, or indulging in the simple pleasure of a warm cup of tea, the choices are guided by what feels right in the depths of your being.

Remember, your body is your closest companion, and it knows what it needs better than anyone else. Trust its wisdom and let it guide you toward a state of relaxation and rejuvenation.

Conclusion

Relaxation is not just about taking a break; it's an essential ingredient for a happy and productive life.